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Post by Rusty Trosclair on Dec 9, 2003 22:38:48 GMT -5
Read it carefully... This is not a thread about beating up famous people. This one is about famous people beating YOU up. So, who would it be? Here's mine.
I would love to wake up one morning, with Christopher Walken standing over my bed. He is dousing it with gasoline and throws a lit match. I jump out of bed in the nick of time, and he proceeds to whip my ass all over my room, using everything as a weapon. In the end, I get tossed through my window and he cuts off my ear with a shard of glass, leaving me bleeding outside my burning room. He then walks off, gets in a Durango, and blares "Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult as he drives off with all of my shit, which he stole from me while I was asleep.
What are your picks?
Thanks.
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Post by endlessjoe on Dec 9, 2003 22:46:42 GMT -5
Haha! Dude, that is great!
If I could choose one famous guy to beat my ass, it would be Gary Busey. He'd be wearing a football jersey, a kilt, and flip-flops, and would wail on me while telling me the finer points of eating in total darkness. I'd learn a thing or two about life, and lose some fingers in the process. You really can't ask for much more than that.
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Post by Nick Hebert on Dec 9, 2003 23:24:11 GMT -5
definately Christopher Lowell...
okay, picture this...
Christopher Lowell is making little trinket for Christmas and I'm watching, snickering everytime he makes a comment I'd consider gay...
Finally, he gets fed up with my laughing and jumps into a karate stance, threatening me. I laugh even harder at the gay man doing karate (it would be funny...). Then he begins wailing away on me, knocking me unconscious. While I'm knocked out, he has his way with me sexually...
its actually a fantasy of mine...
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Post by Shiitake Mushroom-head on Dec 10, 2003 0:30:49 GMT -5
I remember this thread the first time I saw it and I loved it then too. Lets see....
My pick would have to be "Event Horizon"-era Sam Neill, after he tore out his own eyes. While saying that we didnt need eyes to see where we were going, he would proceed to kick my ass all over the room with a very large metal pipe. Then he would grab my head and force feed me images of Hell (where the entire Wazoo clan is waiting to torment me with small plastic forks) and set me on fire. That would rock. Oh, and then he would attack me with an axe because I DO read Sutter Cane.
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Post by bmatherne on Dec 10, 2003 9:36:08 GMT -5
Well this is an easy one...Edward Norton.
I probably would deserve a beating like he gave Jared Leto in "Fight Club". The whole time him screaming at me...You are NOT your Job! You are not your Wallet...and you are not YOUR "EFFING" KHAKIS!!!
HE would say effing. That would be scary.
The whole time, by the way, Michael Madson is waiting patiently with a razor blade while dancing to "Stuck in the Middle With You" by Stealer's Wheel.
Or I wouldn't mind getting beat up by Barb Wire-esque Pamela Anderson.
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SnowBall
Official Wazooteer
NO NO...I'm not lickin' any salt! I swear! Really!
Posts: 99
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Post by SnowBall on Dec 10, 2003 12:12:11 GMT -5
awwww...those are all really sweet!
This is mine!
I'm watching Tae Bo on T.V. and they interrupt the program (like they always do when something good is playing) saying some Jewish priest has been assassinated ...and I (by all right) get pissed off because I was like relaxing on the sofa watching a good work out and they come on the telly giving out useless information that no one cares about. SOOO... I, out of anger, say...fuck the jews! Then Judge Judy just bust in my door and starts beating me with a broom...and starts saying all sorts of Jewish stuff like "ca'poos"
awww
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Post by stubbsPlee on Dec 10, 2003 17:34:56 GMT -5
[shadow=red,left,300]BOB "FAGET" SAGET[/shadow]
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Post by Maximmatt on Dec 29, 2003 9:05:54 GMT -5
I would have to say Trinity from the Matrix, she'd be whipping out the kung-fu and I'd be screaming "I'm sorry I was staring at you camel-toe, I'm sorry!" Actually that's more of a fantasy of mine, so nevermind
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Post by RikkuSuave on Jan 20, 2004 23:15:15 GMT -5
i think i'd wanna be beaten up by Johnny Depp. then i'd be in his space bubble *sigh*
hehe
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Post by ljjo739 on May 16, 2004 19:40:20 GMT -5
Hmmm... Fucking good question. I would probably say Jeff Daniels As the Big Lebowski and as he would be kicking me in the ribs he would be saying, "I'm the dude, bitch, you know the dude, el duda rino," And John Goodman would be right on the side as Walter yelling that I'm entering a world of pain and I'm out of my element *GEDDIT*
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Post by Rusty Trosclair on May 17, 2004 8:41:14 GMT -5
Hmmm... Fucking good question. I would probably say Jeff Daniels As the Big Lebowski and as he would be kicking me in the ribs he would be saying, "I'm the dude, bitch, you know the dude, el duda rino," And John Goodman would be right on the side as Walter yelling that I'm entering a world of pain and I'm out of my element *GEDDIT* I should NOT be able to picture this scene as perfectly as I just did when I almost shot Raisin Bran out my nose while laughing my ass off. Good show! Thanks. |
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wilsty
Fresh Fish
Wilsty
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Post by wilsty on Jul 11, 2008 14:57:46 GMT -5
I'm extremely late replying to this thread by a few years. Haha!
I would say, "Heartbreak Ridge" era Clint Eastwood.
Imagine, if you will, a sandy desert in the middle of nowhere with some hills and mountains in the very far distance, the sky is the darkest shade of blue, and the most terrifying electrical storm is taking place over head. Lightning crashes and lights our faces up as we stare down. The sky opens up and the rain comes.
Torrential downpour.
One more crack of lightning and we face off.
Naturally, I don't stand a chance. It's like fighting the real Captain Guile and I recieve an upper-cut that lifts me off the ground and has me flying backwards landing on my head.
The ground splashes with the sound of my defeat.
Quick, but painful.
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